Why my New Years Resolutions NEVER last

So at the beginning of each year – without fail -I feel an inexplicable need to reevaluate my life choices, plan my future and just make myself a better person in general. So then I start coming up with a list of resolutions, imagining unrealistic scenarios of future success and convincing myself that “this is my year”.

Unfortunately, this random burst of motivation only lasts a couple of hours. The good news is, after 16 years I’ve finally figured out why.

Reason 1. Too much commitment.

The longest time I’ve ever committed to anything – school projects, personal goals, important decisions- is probably around sixty five hours, give or take. Even my music playlist changes on an hourly basis. So, as you can see, it’s clearly impossible for me to commit to a resolution for 365 whole days (actually 366 – leap year).

Reason 2. I’m forgetful.

To be honest, I can’t even remember what I had for lunch today, so can I really be expected to remember a resolution I made at the beginning of the year? Because the reality of the situation is, if I decide to stop eating junk food in January, in February I’ll probably be the CEO of McDonalds.

Reason 3. Why help myself, when I could be helping others?

Look, I can’t help it – I’m just a naturally generous person. So of course if it comes down to choosing between improving myself and improving someone else, obviously I’ll choose the latter. In fact, I’d just like to take this moment to say “You’re Welcome” in advance to all the people who’s lives I’m going to make better this year.


That being said, if you are the type of person who makes new years resolutions and sticks to them, well…. thanks for making the rest of us look bad. And on that note,  Happy New Year Everyone!